Bride Guide: Competing Mothers + Budgets

How to Handle Competing Mothers

It's happened - both sides of the to-be-formed family want to contribute funds to your special day. Every bride is jealous of you. But you know that's not the case. While money isn't an issue competing desires and visions are.

Sometimes, when both families want to participate they argue over who gets to call what shots. Here's what to do:

Don't Take Sides

Step one: don't make your attention or decisions become a tug of war. Step two: never tell one side what amount the other side is contributing. Step three: breathe. 

Set Clear Boundaries

This is the hardest part, but if done right, can save any fiance months of stress-free decisions! 

  • State what matters to you most. Make sure both sides know this and stick to it.
  • Say what you absolutely will not have. Stick to this.
  • Put a cap on the guest list at the beginning and make it equal.
  • Divide tasks and assign projects. Your mom gets to choose the wine at dinner, the other side chooses drinks at cocktail hour.
  • Set time and notice guidelines. No calls during the workday, at least 3 days notice of appointments. Friday nights are a no-go.

Don't Tell Your Wedding Party

We know, you just spent all day at the caterer with two passive-aggressive mothers and happy hour with your MOH including a massive vent session sounds perfect. But, be weary. Sometimes talking and gossiping about inlaws will come back around. Imagine complaining to your bridesmaids and one of them slips some dirt after a few drinks ("See Mrs. Nelson the sequin tablecloths DO look awesome."). BAM, Mother-in-law knows you aired the dirty laundry and questions what else you said too. 

Keep Calm and Carry On

It can be stressful but you always have your partner to turn to. Remember, this is your day and everyone is excited to share it with you. Sometimes if you give a little task to someone - yes, please pick the stir sticks - it will make them extremely happy...and keep them occupied! Here is how to find the best mother of bride outfits.

The best way to ease tensions is staying under budget! Browse here to find what you need today. 

There are plenty of other great directories to choose from on

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